A Quack a Minute

One of the more frustrating things that comes from telling a native Ohioian that you were born in California, is the snappy come back: "Oh, you're from that state full of fruits and nuts." guffaw, snort, ha ha. I love Ohio, but to all those people who have attempted to make me believe that California has cornered the market on the loopy and unusual, I submit this:

Chiropractor James Burda , advertises a miraculous cure in which he sends patients, via telepathy, back to the origin of an injury so they can understand the pain and make adjustments. Dr. Burda says he need not meet the patient, nor even talk by phone, because e-mail works perfectly well, even for people who want chiropractic treatment for their pet. According to his Web site, he discovered his skill by accident, while driving around one day. Not surprisingly, the Ohio State Chiropractic Board announced in April that it would hold a hearing to review Burda's work. [Plain Dealer (Cleveland), 4-6-06]

Mr. Burda conducts his mental magic from Athens, Ohio, but don't you worry friends in Canada, Australia and England... e-mail works perfectly well! Jeesh, how in the world do people who fall for this stuff get through the day? I have no argument with the concept of mind over matter, but someone else's mind over MY matter - and by e-mail no less. Mr. Barnum said it best: "There's a sucker born every minute."

In other news, the Chief's visit to our little burg is just six days away. Much of the mystery of his visit was solved by a long phone call on Saturday, he HAS NOT read my book. Brave man, I must give him that. As the mother of five, I have excellent skills in the art of making people feel guilty and he got both barrels. A copy of my manuscript is now housed on the nightstand in the guest bedroom. I have also thoughtfully provided a red pen, some document flags and sticky notes. The room locks from the outside and I have polished the key. As mother always used to say "they have to go to sleep sometime".